Policy Of Truth
by Cameo Vincenti
Summary: A series of short, sensual shots based on various songs by Depeche Mode.
1. Author's Opening Statement

Welcome to Policy Of Truth. Before we begin, I have a few notes to make. If you don't want to deal with my explanations and such, feel free to skip ahead this.

First, this entire fanfic is based on the lyrics and music of Depeche Mode. Music is something I use often in my writing, however, this 'story' is taking a different approach to that. Rather than write the chapter and find a song that fits it, I will be writing the scenes to fit nearly word for word the song chosen. Expect some lemon from time to time, but keep in mind that nothing will be that explicit, since I have exactly 0% experience writing anything like that. Romance isn't that hard to write, just sex scenes :/ Oh, and the pairing will always remain L and Raito (Light), but each will take turns depending on the song, if you get my drift *winkwink*.

Second, I will be completely open to any requests for certain songs, just keep in mind that all the songs must be by Depeche Mode.

Third, I'm changing the format of the chapters slightly. Meaning, rather than writing my comments and opinions on the chapter at the end of every scene, I will instead be devoting entire separate chapters, which will be helpfully labeled _Read Between The Lines_, to any notes I wish to make. These will be scattered about every 3-5 chapters. Also, I will post lyrics to each song at the beginning of the chapter, so you get an idea of what to expect.

Fourth and finally, the chapters have nothing to do with each other and do not form a real story line. You can read them in any order you choose.

Sexxxxiiiii...

I think I covered everything...Well, then let us begin.

C. Vincenti


	2. Enjoy The Silence

Words like violence

Break the silence

Come crashing in

Into my little world

Painful to me

Pierce right through me

Can't you understand

Oh my little girl

All I ever wanted

All I ever needed

Is here in my arms

Words are very unnecessary

They can only do harm

Vows are spoken

To be broken

Feelings are intense

Words are trivial

Pleasures remain

So does the pain

Words are meaningless

And forgettable

All I ever wanted

All I ever needed

Is here in my arms

Words are very unnecessary

They can only do harm

Enjoy the silence

_

* * *

_"After everything you've done...The crimes you've committed and the harsh words you've spoken to me...You actually expect me to forgive you?"

"I suppose I do, L." Raito turned his face away from the detective. _I thought you'd understand. I thought I could make everything right if I just confessed. Please listen._

"I cannot forgive a murderer that easily. You say you regret everything, but I find it difficult to believe, considering how much you've lied to people in the past." The raven haired man shook his head. "Something as simple as a confession does not necessarily mean you will be forgiven for all you've done. At the most it may lessen your sentencing, but I can make no guarantees."

"Please, listen to me! Can't you understand that everything I said was the truth? Just because I've done hideous things doesn't mean I can't change! And I have changed!"

"Your words are meaningless to me."

L's cold statement pierced through Raito. He felt a tight, throbbing lump in his throat and had to swallow before speaking.

"Is it meaningless that the reason I changed is because of you?" Tears were beginning to collect in the corner of his eyes, something he was not prepared to deal with and only served to elevate his hysteria. "Is it meaningless that even though I wanted you dead I knew I'd never be able to bring myself to kill you? That I can't stand you yet I can't live without you? I had a grand vision of me becoming God of the world, and when you entered the picture I only saw you as an obstacle to overcome! Back when I had no real image or idea of who you were. You were just a letter, without emotion or being." The brunette gave a forlorn smile to the other man.

"You were in my way, and you had to be eliminated. It's easy to kill anything that doesn't appear to have feelings or even a real existence. Anyone can do it, it's like killing an insect. It bothers you so you get rid of it. That's how I felt when it was just a war between L and Kira, two nameless and faceless individuals. When I met you for the first time, I didn't feel any real difference. It wasn't until I lost my memory, probably, that I felt a change within me. Without prejudice to taint my emotions, I saw you for who you really are; a human." Raito sat down on a park bench, head down and arms pressed against his legs for support.

"I realized that every person has a certain spirit, a character that makes them beautiful. It sounds corny, I don't sound like myself, do I?"

"You say things I could never have pictured Raito-kun speaking."

"There! Isn't that some proof of how I've changed?"

L turned away, his hands in his pockets as the silence and separation between them grew. The air was unusually still, as if holding its breath in wait for the detective's reply.

"I've always been just a nameless, faceless being. I detached myself from the person I was born as to become a tool and shapeless figure. Buddhists' detach themselves from worldly desire in order to achieve enlightenment, likewise I abandoned everything that identified me as an individual for the sake of solving crimes."

"That's not true! You have so many quirks and habits, it's impossible for you not to be unique."

"What I am like as a person is not what anyone else sees me as. Who I am does not matter to the public, to criminals, to the leaders of nations." He turned to face Raito, his dark hair concealing his eyes but a despondent look visible on his lips.

"My character has no value. In the end, people are judged based solely on their actions, not their personality. That is why whatever vows and confessions you make to me are pointless. I'm sorry if you feel otherwise. Good bye, Raito-kun." The man turned and walked away, leaving Raito startled and tongue tied.

_How could he have such a negative view of himself? I know spoken vows can easily be broken, but there must be a way for him to believe me and realize everything I'm trying to say is true. There has to be! I can't lose him!_

He ran after the detective.

"L, wait!"

L did not turn around and kept walking, even when the distressed young man had finally caught up with him. In desperation, Raito threw his arms around the raven haired man, stopping him dead in his tracks. He held L close, his face buried in the back of the other man's shoulder. His breath came in short, gasping stutters.

"You made me realize that I never actually wanted to be God. I never wanted the power, I never wanted the recognition. All I ever wanted...All I ever needed...Is here, in my arms..." His voice strained and Raito did something he'd never done in front of another person ever before; openly wept.

"...Raito..."

"L, I love you. I don't care about whatever my punishment will be, I can't leave you with a bad image of me. I want to be remembered as your friend, not a murderer."

No words were spoken for a few moments. Soundlessly, L detached himself from the crying man.

"No, L! Wait-" He was cut off as the detective embraced Raito in a protective, comforting hug.

"I just want you to understand...I want you to know-"

"Shh...Words are trivial. Your feelings and actions convey everything needed. Don't speak. Right now, words can only do harm."

They remained as they were for several minutes, until Raito had collected his emotions and separated himself from L's arms.

"What does it all mean? Do you understand?"

"I suppose I'm confused on the matter. I don't know if I can forgive your past actions, but I do believe I can move beyond them. You are right, the impression we want to leave people with is that of who we are as people, not what we've done. That's not how the world works though, individuals are usually only remembered by there accomplishments."

"If you can't forgive my actions, can you forgive my being?"

L brought his gaze to the young man beside him. He took Raito's hands into his own and planted a small, gentle kiss on his lips.

"I think I can." The raven haired man looked away, a tiny smile and pink blush playing across his porcelain face.

They walked together, hand in hand. There was no need for words, everything that could be said had already been spoken. An understanding, and an accepting.

All that was left was to enjoy the silence.


	3. Never Let Me Down Again

I'm taking a ride with my best friend

I hope he never lets me down again

He knows where he's taking me

Taking me where I want to be

I'm taking a ride with my best friend

We're flying high

We're watching the world pass us by

Never want to come down

Never want to put my feet back down on the ground

I'm taking a ride with my best friend

I hope he never lets me down again

Promises me I'm as safe as houses

As long as I remember who's wearing the trousers

I hope he never lets me down again

Never let me down

See the stars, they're shining bright

Everything's alright tonight

* * *

Lights flashed as as they drove through the city. Buildings illuminated by artificial light, keeping the city awake even after the sun went down. L sat in the passenger seat of a small sports car, Raito behind the wheel.

"Where are you taking me?" L asked quietly.

"Someplace you want to be."

The answer didn't really satisfy the detective's curiosity, but he left it at that. Raito knew where they were going, but L just hoped that tonight wouldn't lead to disappointment like the time before. Just a few days earlier, Raito had promised they go out for the day, alone of course, to the ocean. It was fairly close, and the weather had been beautiful. L rarely went out, and he had really been looking forward to it. He had waited anxiously for his Raito to come and pick him up, but he never showed. L had waited for hours alone, until he gave up and had Watari drive him down himself. An afternoon alone at the beach. It was depressing.

L hadn't pressed Raito into why he'd bailed on him, but he hoped that tonight would make up for it.

_I hope you don't let me down again._

Turning onto a narrow road, the raven haired man noticed that they were driving up a mountain. Trees began appearing, forbidding figures in the dark. They drove in silence for nearly an hour, until they had reached the summit point. Raito parked the car at a lookout on the mountain's edge.

"We're here, L."

L stepped out of the car, shivering from a sudden gust of cold wind. Raito took notice and draped his jacket over his partner's shoulders before leading him to a stone bench.

The view was breath taking. Every light shone brightly down below, giving a hazy red appearance to the sky surrounding the city. The tallest buildings were no longer so majestic and awe-inspiring, having been reduced to a miniature model size. And up above, the stars. Numerous constellations, galaxies, celestial bodies more abundant than L had ever thought possible.

_When was the last time I looked at the night time sky? Being up so high...watching the world...I feel like we're flying._ He snuggled against Raito's warm body.

_I don't want to come down. I'd be happy spending the entire night up here with you. I feel like I'm above the world, everything passing by. It's stunning. If I could, I'd never leave. Never put my feet back down on the ground. _The younger man gave L an affectionate glance.

"I hope this makes up for last time. I'm sorry I let you down, I know how much you'd been looking forward to our trip."

"For bringing me up here, I forgive you Raito-kun. Just promise me you won't let it happen again. And promise me we can come back here again sometime."

Raito nodded, and L, satisfied with this gesture, returned his attention to the dark sky. Everything was alright under the stars.


	4. Personal Jesus

Reach out and touch faith

Your own Personal Jesus

Someone to hear your prayers

Someone who cares

Your own Personal Jesus

Someone to hear your prayers

Someone who's there

Feeling's unknown and you're all alone

Flesh and bone by the telephone

Lift up the receiver

I'll make you a believer

Take second best

Put me to the test

Things on your chest

You need to confess

I will deliver

You know I'm a forgiver

Reach out and touch faith

Your own Personal Jesus

Feeling's unknown and you're all alone

Flesh and bone by the telephone

Lift up the receiver

I'll make you a believer

I will deliver

You know I'm a forgiver

Reach out and touch faith

Your own Personal Jesus

Reach out and touch faith

* * *

_Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring..._

An anxious feeling overwhelmed L. Since he had come to discover the truth, there were things on his mind that would not leave him at ease. He was greatly troubled, and he felt he needed to tell someone. He normally confided in Watari...but this time he believed the man would not understand his situation. Only one other person would truly be able to make sense of L's disturbed thoughts and emotions.

_Ring...Ring..._

Finally, a voice on the other line.

"Hello?"

"Hello...Kira..."

"...L..."

"Yes..."

"...What do you want?"

"This may strike you as a strange request, but if possible I would like to meet with you in person..."

Silence. Then, a response.

"What's your motive?"

"None. Honestly...I only want to talk. There are some things on my chest..."

More silence.

"Hello?"

"Fine. Meet me in an hour at the following address. Alone."

"Alright."

* * *

"Well, you managed to drag me out here. What is it you want to talk about?" Raito was glaring at the man with his arms crossed. What was so important that L had called him in the middle of the night?

"I uh...uhm...I n-need to s-share some thoughts on my mind..."

"L, you're stammering, what's wrong?"

The raven haired man was visibly shaking a bit too. He was trying to speak but the words wouldn't come, and his eyes kept darting around the room. L put a hand against his face and sighed loudly.

"It's not usually this difficult for me to speak, but I seem to find myself tongue tied because of the subject matter..."

"I don't even know what you're trying to tell me. If you can't say it outright, write it down or something. I'll listen to whatever you have to say."

"There are...things on my chest that I need to confess."

"I'm already aware of that. What is it you have to tell me?"

Again, L paused, collecting his thoughts.

"I...know the situation between us is tense. Especially since I came to discover the truth of your identity. But I want you to know...that do not intend to act upon this the way I'd anticipated..."

Raito had a serious, questioning look on his face. He didn't appear to exactly believe what L was saying, but was still intrigued nonetheless.

"Why is that?"

"I...because..."

"Because...?"

"I like you." L finally blurted out.

"Uhm...as a friend...?" He knew what the detective was trying to say, but he wanted to hear it himself. He wanted to hear L say it.

"Uh...you know...like...uhm..."

"Go on..."

The raven haired man made the 'keep going' motion with his hand, coaxing Raito to fill in the blanks for himself.

"Surely you know what I'm trying to get at..."

"Yes, but I want to hear you say the words yourself."

"Why?"

"Maybe I'm just a little sadistic, but it's entertaining to watch you be nervous and struggle." He laughed innocently.

L took a breath and composed himself.

"I am attracted to you."

"...And?..."

"What more is there to say? If you were expecting me to say that I love you that would not necessarily be an accurate statement. As of right now what I feel is not love, at least I don't think it is."

"A simple crush or lust?" At this question L's cheeks flushed red.

"...lust..." His voice was timid and quiet, and Raito found it rather endearing to see the man so shy and nervous. It made him seem innocent in a way. The mass murderer strode over to the far side of the room. After several moments of silence, he turned around to face L.

"We've been at war since the day you made your declaration against Kira in public. If anyone knew about this...about _you_, it would tarnish and likely destroy your entire reputation. Among other things..."

"No one knows, I haven't told a soul except you-" Raito held up his hand cutting him off.

"After all our warring, the hateful things we've said and done to each other, it comes down to this. I wanted you dead from the beginning. You have sinned in the eyes of the new God, and nothing will change that. However...Kira can be kind. I will deliver you. Kira is a forgiver."

L raised a dark eyebrow and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"If you mean to convert me to your 'religion', it's not likely to happen. Despite my feelings and desires I do not share your ideologies."

"Just because you're not a believer doesn't mean you can't receive God's compassion and mercy. Try me. Test me. The moment you picked up that phone, put the receiver to your ear...even if it takes my entire life, I'll make you a believer." He sat very close to L and wrapped his arm around his head, stroking the black locks. Then, he held L protectively, almost possessively, his face very close to the other man's. The detective could feel Raito's breath on his neck.

"L..." Kira whispered into his ear.

"Reach out and touch faith."

A surprised squeak escaped the pale man's lips as he felt a tongue lick the shell of his ear. His entire face became hot and he closed his eyes a moment. Raito nibbled his ear and let his lips descend, placing kisses on the side and back of L's neck.

Despite the heat he felt from the younger man's mouth against his skin, the action caused him to shiver. A hand traced small circles on his back through the thin material of his shirt. L relaxed and let himself enjoy the sensations. His head drooped slightly.

Raito took advantage of this, grasping the man's chin and turning his face towards him. He looked into those dark eyes and saw a hurricane of emotions. Pleasure, passion, confusion, desire, suspicion, regret, annoyance, endearment, worry, and happiness. The normally unreadable L fell open like a book, his every thought and wish visible to the one he'd called his enemy.

But no longer would that be the case.

Lips pressed against lips in a surprisingly tender and almost loving fashion. Eyes closed. Absorbed in the feelings of the flesh. Fire, but not raging flames, softer like candlelight.

The kiss deepened until both men realized they had forgotten to breathe. Hesitantly they broke away, just long enough for L to wrap his arms around the brunette's before kissing him again. Raito felt a forceful tongue pressing against his closed lips and allowed its passage. The man before him let out a pleased yet quiet moan, his tongue flicking around Raito's mouth. Wet muscles fought for dominance just like Kira and L had in the past fought with their own minds. As in both situations, there was no clear winner and loser.

Minutes later, lips relaxed and the two separated themselves enough to regain individuality. The younger man took in short breaths. He looked back at L. A small smile played across the detective's face, telling a story for which there were no words.

Kira would possess the man in every way. He would possess him in body, mind and soul. He would make him a believer.

"Reach out and touch faith."


	5. Read Between The Lines 1

Here is the first of my _Read Between The Lines_ notes.

A lot has changed as far as my ideas for where I wanted this story to go. The first chapter I wrote, Enjoy The Silence, felt severely lacking. It was my first attempt at this different writing technique, so I was unsure of what to do. As I wrote the next couple chapters, things began falling into place and I started understanding just how to approach these. I've since re-written that chapter, and I'm much happier with the results.

Never Let Me Down Again was a quick affair, and though it's short I find it endearing. That was exactly the extent of my romance writing abilities up to that point pretty much. Sweet little scenes without much passion, more friendly than loving. Nevertheless, I like this chapter very much. The way I put the lyrics into the dialogue and actions of L and Raito in this particular scene was how I'd initially planned on writing this entire series.

I was surprised and actually amazed by Personal Jesus, to be honest. I'd had only a vague idea of where I wanted to take it when I sat down to write the scene. That, ladies and gentlemen, is the closest I've ever gotten to writing an all-out lemon. Also my first real try at such a thing. I think I do possess the ability to write romantic, passionate scenes when I set my mind to it (I actually had to ask for help from my alternate personality, if you wanted to know). I REFUSE TO WRITE AN ACTUAL SEX SCENE. It's simply not happening. It doesn't interest me, and I think a lot more can be said with foreplay and the like.

Soon to come: Strangelove, Master And Servant, Sacred, and World In My Eyes.

Give me any feedback, opinions or criticism you may have, I'm completely open to anything.

C. Vincenti


End file.
